When in Rome...

I’ve finally been able to get away after a fun but crazy season of the Real Housewives of New York City and the kick off of my book tour. It was time for a much-needed break, although promoting my book has been a savior to me. It’s kept me very busy with appearances and I have more dates scheduled when I return nice and rested from the south of France.

Why not go explore other countries? You can always go back home. Remember being interested is what makes you interesting. Take chances and follow your instincts. Travel makes us look outside ourselves and our everyday concerns and elevates our sensibilities and compassion for others. It increases our sense of wonder and intensifies the pleasure we find in the familiar.

I’ve always been curious and willing to learn from everything and everyone. My older brothers and sisters can attest to my adventurous nature and to the fact that my fearlessness got me into some sticky situations that required their first aid skills when I was young. I haven’t changed much since then but instead of climbing tall trees to see what is out beyond, I have the good fortune to fly to foreign lands. I think travel is a great way to look beyond ourselves and our everyday lives especially if we immerse ourselves in the culture that we are visiting.

I have some suggestions that will greatly enhance your travel experiences.

• Before you go, learn a few key phrases in the language and you will receive warmer welcomes. Be able to say “hello”, “goodbye”, “thank you” and “excuse me”.
• Learn about the country before you arrive by reading a guidebook or using online resources. Familiarize yourself with customs that are different than ours.
• Dress nicely everywhere you go, including on the plane. Sweat suits are never appropriate. Instead, wear comfortable wrinkle resistant knits.
• Learn the currency so that your transactions go more smoothly and so that you can bargain for items you must have.
• Try native cuisines and gather recipes for dishes you loved to share with friends back home.
• Carry a card from your hotel with you when you are out and about, especially if you don’t speak the language.
• Keep track of your passport and money at all times. Losing either can turn a fun trip into a bureaucratic nightmare.
• Remember to show respect to everyone you meet on your travels. That alone can go a long way to dispel the reputation of Americans as uncouth travelers.

Tip: You only live once so save your money, be adventurous and explore the unknown.

Eating Well

For me, food is one of life’s great pleasures. I believe that eating is a celebration and is sensual. Eating well is one of my secrets to a healthier and happier life. By slowing down and taking the time to enjoy your food, you will have better skin, a slimmer figure and radiant health.

My kitchen in the Hamptons is a gathering place for my friends and family. I take the time to create a relaxed atmosphere where we can savor our meals together. It doesn’t take a lot of money or culinary talent to bring joy and happiness to your meals if you share them with the people you love.

When I’m not on the run, I begin each day by having a healthy breakfast with my children. We have a fruit salad and cereal or whole grain toast with juice and tea. I eat lean proteins and vegetables for lunch and dinner. I do not go long without eating and always eat when I’m hungry. I swear by a light snack in the afternoon to curb hunger so that I don’t eat like a bear at dinner. Healthy snacks with an emphasis on protein take longer to digest and will fill you up longer. I like low-fat yogurt, string cheese, or a few nuts.

Denying yourself what you crave is a sure way to over indulge. When I crave sweets, I eat a Xochai dark chocolate square. A piece of fruit or some berries is also a good option. I just read that ripe plums and prunes can prevent bone loss and also may be able to reverse it. In general, the darker the fruit’s skin, the higher the antioxidants within. I guess that is why I like red wine so much.

Listen to what your body tells you. There are thousands of diet and nutrition books out there all touting different strategies to reach the same goals, a healthy weight and body. I like the Blood Type Diet, because I think each person is actually a carnivore or an herbivore. Since I have Type O blood, I need more meat and my body craves it. Nonetheless, I limit how much red meat I eat and concentrate my protein in cheese, chicken, pork, fish and seafood. And I eat my veggies.

Michelle Obama with the help of her girls and an elementary school class just planted an organic kitchen garden on the White House lawn. The Obama’s will be eating a rainbow this summer and so will my family. Lucky for me there are farmer’s markets and fresh produce stands all over the Hamptons. To find a farmer’s market or stores and restaurants selling locally produced food near you, go to www.localharvest.org.

Tip: Drink twenty minutes before or after a meal. People have a tendency to wash their food down with a beverage rather than chewing each bite thoroughly and allowing the enzymes to begin their work. Instead, sip a glass of red wine with your dinner. Enjoy!

Skin Care

I view taking care of my appearance as a chance to pamper myself. After last week’s blog on Beauty Tips was published, I received many questions about my skin care regimen, specifically how I take care of my skin and the products I use.

I treat myself to a deep cleansing facial once a month at the Yasmine Djerradine Spa in New York. Just a short walk from Barneys, this Moroccan inspired spa is a peaceful sanctuary from my fast-paced life.

If a professional facial is out of your budget, don’t worry. There are plenty of products in your drugstore or supermarket designed to treat any skin type. Olay has some great products and my daughter Victoria is a big fan.

You can pamper your skin at home by following these guidelines for a simple at-home facial. This whole process takes less than 45 minutes. Carve out this time for yourself each month regardless of how busy you are. You are worth it!

1. Lock the bathroom door, lower the lights, burn scented candles and put on some soft, restful music.
2. Wash your face gently with a cleanser, cream or mild soap. Rinse with warm water.Steam your skin over a bowl of hot water. Carefully lean over the bowl and drape a towel over your head to trap the steam. Be careful not burn yourself.
3. Next, exfoliate gently with a scrubbing product or a slightly rough washcloth. Rinse the exfoliating product away with warm water. Pat your skin dry with a soft towel.
4. Apply a mask of your choice, remembering to choose the correct product for your skin type. Set a timer for ten or fifteen minutes and hope your kids don’t interrupt, but they will, that is why in Step 1, you locked the door.
5. Rinse with cool water and feel how smooth your skin is.

Each day, it is important to cleanse, tone, moisturize and protect your skin with sunscreen. Don’t forget your décolletage and the backs of your hands. Remember to remove your makeup before bed each night so your skin can breathe.

Right now, I’m using these products in my daily skin care regimen. You can pick them up at any department store or online.

1. Cleanser: B. Kamins Chemist, Vegetable Skin Cleanser (all-in-one cleansing and makeup removal).
2. Toner/Exfoliation: Biologique Recherche Paris, Lotion P50 (just a few drops on a cotton pad balances skin and reduces pores).
3. Day Cream: Intraceuticals, Rejuvenate Moisture Binding Cream (locks in moisture and prevents environmental damage).
4. Night Cream: B. Kamins Chemist, Menopause Skin Cream (provides the skin with vital nutrients lost during peri-menopause and menopause).
5. Eye Cream: Revision, Teamine Eye Complex (reduces under eye darkness while moisturizing).
6. Mask: Biologique, Masque Vivant (mask balances skin, reduces pores, controls sebum).
7. Sunscreen: Laroche-Posay, Anthelios XL SPF 50+ Melt in tinted cream.
8. Eye Makeup Remover: Clinique Rinse Off Eye Makeup Solvent, the blue bottle.

Tip: Here is my Skin Mask Recipe – use three times per week for vibrant skin.

1-Tablespoon Biologique Masque Vivant
1-Teaspoon Lotion P50
½ Teaspoon Baking Soda

Mix ingredients together and apply to face. Relax. Leave on for ten to fifteen minutes. You can rinse the mask off in the shower or in the sink with cool water. I prefer to shower since it’s a pretty sticky mask.

Beauty Tips

Less is always more. Especially when it comes to makeup! A chic woman always draws attention to herself without ever being obvious.

I learned by living in New York and abroad in Europe that French women appear to wear little or no makeup but in fact are dedicated to cosmetics and passionate about beauty products. French woman adhere to the rule of “never too much of anything.”

Coco Chanel once said, “The best color in the whole world, is the one that looks good on you!” How true this is. Makeup artists at department stores will gladly match your skin tone to foundation, blusher and eye shadow.

When I was modeling in New York, I would sometimes stop at a department store before a date to have my makeup done. If you are planning a special evening, why not have your face made up by a professional? I always tipped the makeup artists and made many friends at a number of counters. I was always welcomed back.

I can’t say enough how important it is to sample makeup before purchasing. My good friend and mentor, Princess Hohenlohe, used to leave a department store with bags of samples. She could afford to buy any cosmetic she wanted but was a careful shopper. Samples are there for the taking, so don’t be shy. You will ultimately save money by purchasing what works for you instead of cluttering up your makeup bag with the wrong products.

People tell me all the time how natural I look. I achieve a healthy, glowing look by emphasizing my cheekbones with bronzer. If you have gorgeous eyes, play them up with eyeliner and mascara. If you have full, luscious lips, select a sexy red lipstick and apply less eye makeup.

A general rule is that if you are accentuating your eyes with dark or bright makeup; go with a light lip color. If you choose to play up your lips, keep the eye makeup to a minimum.

Unless you live in the Sun Belt, you should have summer and winter makeup, especially foundation and blusher or bronzers.

What you’ll find in my makeup bag:

• Liquid Foundation: Armani #7
• Bronzing Powder: Chanel
• Eyebrow Pencil: Chanel
• Mascara: Lancôme
• Eyeliner Pencil: Chanel
• Lip Gloss: Chanel

Tip: Try all kinds of makeup, and don’t be afraid to change. Your makeup doesn’t have to be wildly expensive. You can find wonderful cosmetics in the drugstore. Find what works for you and stick with it – day and night, summer and winter.

Fine Dining

I love dining out. Last week, I went to Graydon Carter’s new restaurant Monkey Bar and had a wonderful time. The food was fabulous and the décor divine. The well-dressed diners didn’t drag their coats to the table nor did I hear any cell phones during our meal. The most elegant restaurants make you feel as if you are eating in a private home.

The Monkey Bar’s maitre d’ sat our party at a terrific table against the wall, which I prefer, instead of in the middle of the room. We had a great view of the entire scene. What do you do if you find yourself being led to a table by the restrooms, the kitchen, too close to a workstation or too near a colleague? Simply ask the maitre d’ or the hostess if another table is available. If possible, most restaurants will try to accommodate you. When you make the reservation ask for a table in the location you want – on the terrace, in the front room or the back, upstairs or down, perhaps a booth.

I’ll never forget the time I was dining with my father-in-law, Victor Comte de Lesseps, an ambassador and gourmand, at the Amstel in The Hague. He knew exactly what he preferred and sent back food to the kitchen often, much to our great embarrassment. When the waiter brought him a filleted fish, he lost his temper and shouted, “I ordered fish with a head and a tail. I want the whole fish”. Needless to say, he got what he wanted but made us uncomfortable in the process. It is better to discreet when sending food back.

Here are a few restaurant faux pas that you should avoid:

• Taking your coat, umbrellas, shopping bags, and briefcases to the table. Check them when you enter.
• Putting your phone on the table. Leave it on vibrate and keep it out of sight.
• Use your inside voice. You don’t want to disturb others, and you certainly don’t want people to eavesdrop. You never know who is listening.
• Calling out or snapping your fingers to get the attention of your server. If a quiet “excuse me” or a subtle gesture doesn’t work, ask a busboy or the maitre d’ to send your waiter over.
• Your purse belongs on your lap, the floor or on an empty seat.
• Picking up anything you drop. Just get the attention of the waiter or busboy and ask him for a replacement fork or whatever has fallen.
• Brushing crumbs or stacking plates. That’s what wait staff is for.

Tip:   Despite what your mother told you about keeping your elbows off the table at all times, it is acceptable between courses. Leaning forward a bit on your elbows shows that you are listening with interest.  

The Gracious Guest

As much as I love being a host, I adore being a guest when a great hostess is running the show! There is nothing like kicking back and going with the flow. I remember to acknowledge the effort and planning that goes into hosting me, beginning with promptly responding to the invitation and asking if there is anything I can bring or if I can help with the event.

Once I accept an invitation, I do not cancel unless there is an unavoidable conflict such as a sudden illness or a family crisis such as losing a pet. I am a dependable guest who a hostess can count on showing up. If you really can’t accept an invitation for whatever reason, call with your sincere regrets. Don’t go into a detailed explanation of why you can’t attend. You should respond to your host as soon as possible so someone else can go in your place.

Many invitations will tell you what to wear, such as “black tie” or “casual”. If the invitation does not explain the dress, call your hostess and ask. When in doubt about what to wear, it is always better to arrive overdressed. A simple black dress goes everywhere and will make you look chic and elegant. You’ll be the best dressed at the barbeque!

I like to arrive within fifteen minutes of the time on the invitation so that I can actually enjoy a conversation with my hosts before they become too busy. It is respectful to be on time. For a structured event like a dinner party, you should be no more than fifteen minutes late.

Here are some tips for being a gracious guest:

• Respond to the RSVP ASAP, no later than a week or by the RSVP date.
  
• Arrive on time. If you are going to more than fifteen minutes late to a small gathering, call with the “I’ll be there in five” line.
  
• Cancel only if it’s an emergency.
  
• Bring a hostess gift – don’t arrive empty handed.
  
• Socialize with everyone. Your job is to help the hostess create a party atmosphere.
  
• Participate enthusiastically in any activities suggested by the host – party games and singing come to mind.
  
• Offer to help your hostess during the party or for clean up (hope she’ll say no). 
  
• Discretely thank your hostess for a wonderful time when you leave. Don’t interrupt her on the dance floor.
  
• Call the next day or send a note to thank your hosts. If it was a real shindig, send flowers.
  
• Reciprocate your hosts’ hospitality by inviting them to your parties.

Tip: Never complain or explain. If you accept an invitation, go with the flow and participate enthusiastically.

Packing the Perfect Weekend Bag

Memorial Day weekend is almost here! I’ve always considered this weekend to be the beginning of summer and I’m looking forward to hosting guests at our home in the Hamptons. Because I travel frequently, I can pack a weekend bag in fifteen minutes or less. That’s how easy it should be. Packing the perfect bag is essential to go from the pool or beach, to lunch, shopping and then out for the evening.

If you are flying, everything you bring must fit in a carry-on bag including toiletries in 3 oz. sizes or less and if you are driving, one small suitcase should suffice, especially if you are traveling with other people. Your travel outfit should consist of the bulkiest items that would take up space in your weekend bag. Wear your blazer, boots or thick-soled shoes rather than trying to pack them. Must haves:

• T-shirts/tailored cotton shirt
• Jeans
• Light sweater
• Fun blouse
• Dress that travels well in a solid color jersey or knit and is basic so you can accessorize.
• Skirt
• Accessories that can easily mix with everything.
• Ballet flats
• Dress shoes/sandals
• Flip flops
• Bathing suit and cover up
• Pajamas that work outside your bedroom in case the bathroom entrance is in the hall.
• Travel toiletries

Tip: Getting ready for the weekend doesn’t have to be a headache. You will get the best mileage from clothes that are simple and classic. Remember, having too many things to choose from can be confusing and that less is always more.