Slow Down and Take a Deep Breath

One of my favorite mantras is “if you don’t take care of yourself, nobody else will”. That’s why I’m taking a couple of days off to go to a spa. I know it’s time to take a break when my busy life starts to take a toll on my wellbeing because I haven’t had enough sleep, exercise or healthy food. Luckily I’ve made healthy living a habit so when I lapse I feel it. Here is how I get back on track to restoring balance to my life:

• I make sure that I’m getting at least seven to eight hours of sleep per night and try to hit the sheets free of worry, arguments and stress. My energy, concentration and patience with my husband, family and people in general improve greatly with enough rest.

• I make time for practicing yoga and meditation. Yoga strengthens my body and clears my head of distractions and worry. When I practice yoga regularly, I am restored to centeredness and wellbeing. If yoga is not for you, walking works well too to clear the mind.

• I increase my intake of fresh vegetables, lean meats and fish. I also lessen my caffeine and alcohol intake and drink more water and herbal teas. When I prepare healthy, tasteful meals for my family and friends, everything always tastes better and everyone is happy.

Tip: Taking good care of yourself doesn’t have to be expensive or time intensive. By getting enough rest, eating well and exercising daily, you can bring balance back to your life. I find that I can accomplish so much more when I’m awake, energized and feeling positive!

Let Men Be Men

This week on the Real Housewives of New York City, I gave Bethenny advice on how important it is to be a bit of a damsel in distress at times. I think women are doing so much today career-wise and otherwise that they often forget that men like to feel needed. I know my opinion is controversial but I believe that there aren’t enough Betty Boops left in the world. Men love girls who like to have fun and who understand that femininity is essential to attraction.

It is possible to be a strong, accomplished woman in matters of business, yet be soft in affairs of the heart. Men respond positively to women who dress like women (a flirty skirt and high heels might do the trick). Men love when women speak softly, listen intently, and act flirtatiously. A date should not be treated like a business meeting – it is a chance to be engaging, sexy and whimsical. It is by being elegantly provocative that a woman communicates her interest to a man.

Tip: Here a few ways to turn up the heat during your next encounter with a man who intrigues you:

• The gaze – look into his eyes a few beats longer.
• Talk in a soft, low, provocative voice – you will both need to lean toward each other, drawing attention to your lips.
• Keep up the banter – being light and playful keep the energy high.
• Touch his arm lightly – only the briefest of touches and only above the belt unless you’re playing footsy!
• Show him you’re interested in him without giving him your business card. If he wants your number he’ll ask for it.
• Leave him wanting more.

Table Manners

Last week on the Real Housewives of New York City, I hosted a luncheon at the Hampton Classic in honor of my daughter Victoria. She was leaving for boarding school at the end of summer and I felt that a bit of dining etiquette would help her as she ventured off to tables unknown.

Even the children of a Count and Countess need to learn table manners by instruction and example. It is my job as their mother to prepare them to live independently and to function in polite society. When I was growing up, I thought I knew everything as most teenagers do. Once I ventured out in the world, I realized very quickly how much I didn’t know about table manners and I was unprepared for the level of sophistication found in New York and Europe. I want to ensure that Victoria and Noel are prepared for adulthood and I believe that giving them a good foundation in etiquette and manners will smooth the way for them throughout their lives. Does this mean that my children never chew with their mouths open or use the wrong utensil? Absolutely not my darlings! Even a Countess makes a faux pas once in a while…don’t we all?

Tip: If you expect your children to be polite and consistently reinforce polite behavior, they will grow up to be well-mannered adults capable of functioning at every level of society. Parents must set an example of polite behavior. The best place to start is by using proper dining etiquette at home while eating dinner with your children on a regular basis. Remember children learn by example!

TIME Magazine

TIME Magazine this week reported that my Real Housewives of New York City tag line, “I never feel guilty about being privileged”, means that I am insensitive to today’s economic realities. If I could add to my tag line, I would say “and I am grateful for everything I have!”

Champagne and gourmet doggy treats to celebrate our Highland Terrier Aston’s first birthday? Why not? At least I didn’t charge our guests for attending! Aston is a well-behaved and much loved member of our family. He regularly attends small gatherings and often is the life of the party. I am fortunate to be able to pamper my pet while supporting many worthwhile charities, including, as many of you saw on last week’s RHONY show, the American Cancer Society. I am constantly aware of the abundance in my life and I understand how hard it is to make a living, especially during tough economic times. That is why, whenever I have the opportunity, I share my time and my resources to help those less fortunate than me. So my darlings, does this mean I’ll stop living la dolce vita and deny those I love, including my little Aston, wonderful parties to celebrate life’s milestones? Absolutely not.

Tip: Give as much as you can. Although you might not have the financial resources right now to give to charity, you can volunteer your time or help a friend or family member in need. This is how to live the good life.